thatotherperv: (e. skeleton blowjob)
so, because I'm a masochist, I just watched the recent-ish Oprah episode about how to talk to your kids about sex.

pretty much all I've got to say about that is, it breaks my heart how sex-negative most Americans are in general, how squeamish they are about giving honest answers to their kids, and the fact that it's *shocking* to a room full of women to suggest that it might be a good idea to encourage their daughters to masturbate, so that they have an outlet for the inevitable urges that need to go *somewhere* if you want to keep them from having sex too young...whatever your personal threshold for that might be.

every once in a while one of you lovely people will post about discussions that you've had with your kids about sex & gender issues, and it always makes me feel warm and fuzzy and reassured that there are people out there having open and honest discussions. my own parents were the standard model of repression, but that's what I had a big sister for.

so I just wanted to say thanks, flist. keep up the good work :)
thatotherperv: (d. perverted and proud (by clouds_of_wh)
so, I made a run to McD's this morning for a chicken biscuit (how thrilled was I when they started carrying those here? I miss NC <3) and when I pulled up, I was listening to a podcast on the g-spot.

I honestly didn't think about it til the guy popped his head out for my credit card just in time to hear "...an expulsion of fluid. That is female ejaculation."

he was all O_O "Uh...."

and because I didn't hit pause, it kept on going with something like, "when you're ready for some g-spot play, first, go pee...."

BWAHAHAHAHAHA. and here the guy was thinking it couldn't get any more flabbergasting than female ejaculation. I've never seen someone turn THAT shade of red. I tried really hard not to crack up until after I was pulling away, but. yeah.
thatotherperv: (e. mickey whore (by vamptastica))
[Poll #1323173]



fun bonus fact...intergluteal intercourse is when you hump someone's buttcrack. course, "you" must have a penis for the term to apply. but whatever....

uhm.

Aug. 24th, 2008 07:48 pm
thatotherperv: (d. mock the phallus (by lurker32))
you know how sometimes you can hear a commercial a thousand times and then suddenly you're like...wait. what?

the commercial for the Mirena contraceptive implant. when they're babbling the fine print, she says candidates for Mirena are in a stable relationship.

...is that medically relevant somehow? or is that form of birth control just not available for, you know, us single sluts.
thatotherperv: (o. qaf faggot (by forever_xwrong))
hey guys, I just wanted to check in on the drabble call I did...last week? whenever I did it, anyway. I loved yalls prompts, and when I went to write I decided I was too squeamish about smudging characterization to write them cold. chalk it up to virgo detail-fussing.

so I bought the POTC trilogy and am rewatching that, and the juices are stirring...especially on the jack/kaylee, hee! I have to order QAF because none of the stores in town carry any of it. apparently Will & Grace and sometimes Queer Eye are innocuous enough but QAF is just too gay. after all, the homos in that show have the nerve to FUCK. I even asked at the register in one place and the girl looked at me and said "what's that?"

and then the baby jesus wept. because he enjoys the manlove too, dontcha know.

cest la vive, it's the world I'm currently living in.

anyway, they're hopefully coming by the end of next month. so long off because school's about to start.

*smooches*
thatotherperv: (e. jon lolz (by lidi))
you know why I love Jon? he makes the choice a little bit easier in those laugh-or-cry situations.

god. srsly? srsly.



thatotherperv: (d. wants prostate (by clouds-of-white))
I've been thinking a lot about the prostate. hahaha. as a slash writer, I figure it's pretty much my solemn duty to think about the prostate as much as possible, and by the looks of things, you all agree with me.

but for a long time it's been bugging me. what the hell does that actually feel like? it's not like there's any way for me to find out for myself, more's the pity, but I've been getting the sneaking suspicion lately that we're getting it wrong.

my theories, let me show you them. also, some tmi about my own experience with the clitoris and g-spot. basically, if you're happy in Porny Denial Land, I'd avoid. )

anyone that can confirm or deny any of the above will be met with gratitude. *eyes the penises on my flist*
thatotherperv: (illyria confuzzled (by lit_gal))
ok, so I was reading this fic where Jensen can't come. like, he can get hard and fuck like a jackrabbit, it's not erectile dysfunction, but he doesn't always come when he has sex. like he just can't always get there.

so I gotta ask, o wise flist...is that a Thing? if that's a Thing, I didn't know it was a Thing. obviously a lot of women have that problem, but is that a Thing for guys? or was this just complete bullshit?
thatotherperv: (jensen/chris (by frontyardninja))
no internet plus upcoming finals makes mel something something (go crazy?)

I just opened like, 20 of yalls posts in tabs that looked interesting. these aren't even fic things, just personal/misc posts I want to keep up with. *facepalm* you'll hear from me sometimes next decade.

a blabber on where and how I've been )

so anyway I have come to accept that I am incapable of having normal sex dreams about my favorite celebrities. first there was the dream about Jon stewart where he was a gay man in a marriage of convenience and we agreed to have lots of hot orgies.

so the other night, I was thinking before I went to bed about the convention of making Chris into Jensen's cousin in j2 fic, when the author doesn't want to address Chris/Jen overtones. and how that makes me itch to write Chris/Jen cousincest, haha.

so I go to sleep. and I have this dream. *facepalm* I think you can guess where this is going.

it was christmas or something and Chris was my cousin, I guess, who I'd grown up with but hadn't seen in a few years, but had always had a thing for. and we were flirting the whole time and our family was politely ignoring the whole thing as best they could, and I kept baiting him into kissing me, but all I could get were these chaste sort of family kisses. so we're sneaking around and my sister's all, are you trying to bang our cousin? and I'm like, yeah sorta-kinda-definitely, and my sister being my sister found this extremely amusing. and then finally I lost my patience with his insistence on being, you know, *not incestuous*, and he gave me another damn innocent kiss and I was like, Christian Kane, you are a huge fucking cocktease.

and the look on his *face*. and then I walked away.

and then later, just as we were about to fuck (hey, I knew what I was doing...you throw down that kind of challenge, you get results), another cousin (not Jensen, more's the pity...I could have worked with that) arrived and cockblocked and I woke up all pissy.

I mean I guess it's not that hard to figure out where it came from, with the bunny I was contemplating before bed, and the end no doubt being influenced by state of the mel item #4. but regardless, I was highly amused that my brain seems intent on creating these ridiculous premises for my sex dreams.
thatotherperv: (gen mock the phallus (by lurker32))
my sister brought this to my attention earlier. just in case you haven't read it.

Labor of Love: is society ready for a pregnant husband?
not hypothetical. a transgendered man and his wife are 5 months into a healthy pregnancy. pretty nifty, though I'm sorry for the trouble they've gone through. not just the human kind but the endometriosis and the ectopic pregnancy.

dude, if my hypothetical future husband wants to carry our kid, he can have.at.it.
thatotherperv: (jon lolz (by lidi))
I enjoyed this interview. also, I love this man. in case I haven't mentioned this before.

also, I'm behind in fic. but you know...I have a three-day weekend coming up. lol. I'll be back.

thatotherperv: (gen wants prostate (by clouds-of-white))
in our culture, it is assumed that men who act on stage are gay (or at least a little bent), while men who act in movies or tv are almost definitely straight until we're told otherwise.

discuss.

*sits back with steepled fingers and waits for you to sort out this anomaly*
thatotherperv: (Default)
so, [livejournal.com profile] felisblanco made a posting about prince alberts this morning, and then I, for some reason, felt compelled to go to the wikipedia article. and then. I found out some interesting additional things. such as urethral play and the prince's wand. actually, first I came across the wand and then my eyes got like this: O_o and then I looked up the other.

and.....ow.

OWWWWWW.

is this pleasurable somehow? is it like a pain-based pleasure? it must be. it's....*crosses legs sympathetically*

just when I think fandom has introduced me to every kinky concept known to god and man, I...am proven wrong.

eta: additional photographic evidence (worksafe).

not at all even remotely worksafe:
oh. my. god.
Oh. My. God.
OH. MY. GOD.
somebody hold me cuz I is traumatized
and last but not least
dude, it's trying to run away.

ok no. I take it all back. NOW I'm traumatized (again, not in the least bit worksafe). or keep-your-food-down safe. or ever let anyone touch your hoohoo again safe. *crosses legs*
thatotherperv: (gen pulp for the boys)
so as much as the stagegay/bandom debate (*cough*kerfluffle*cough*) raised as much ire and interest in me as a slice of unbuttered toast, I really enjoyed reading this post on appropriation of "the gay lifestyle" in the media. it's good food for thought on a subject that my mind has been circling distantly for some time now. especially since I started watching QaF and Emmett's conflict over being the sexless clown.

I've been debating with myself the degree to which certain shows, specifically Will & Grace and Queer Eye, help or hinder the mainstreaming of homosexuality. on one hand, they both do follow the pattern of cultural appropriation...reducing an oppressed minority to a comedic stereotype, washed clean of all the "scary" aspects and made more harmless as a result.

on the other hand, anything other than sexless comedy would never have made it to network television when Will & Grace began. it's as old as the argument between Booker T and DuBois...probably older than that: are such half-measures compromise or victory?

my brain isn't up to full-fledged meta thinkiness for my own post, but I'd love to hear your own thoughts on this. no-holds-barred victory, necessary compromise, or more of an insult than a blessing? you decide :)
thatotherperv: (db scared to look (by 43100))
*headdesk*

who says I can't get real news from comedy central?

Dr. James Holsinger is being appointed to be the next Surgeon General. why does this make me feel like I'm taking crazy pills? Because Dr. Holsinger wrote a paper (for the United Methodist Church, I might add) on the pathophysiology of male homosexuality.

what is pathophysiology? "the study of abnormal (or diseased) physiology"

I guess female homosexuality is physiologically normal. *stares*

the pdf of his report is here. (link opens DIRECTLY to the pdf)

let me tell you, it is a real scientific gem.

It is absolutely clear that anatomically and physiologically the alimentary and reproductive systems in humans are separate organ systems.

no SHIT, sherlock. he says this, or some variation of this, 3 or 4 times in the "paper." as best I can tell, it's the thesis of the paper. I wish I was kidding.

the whole thing reads like it was being written for a high school audience...or actually, younger. undoubtedly it's because his audience was a non-scientific organization. this should make it better, but to me, it only makes it worse, because he's presenting them with drivel that could never ever be published in a medical journal.

this thing is so riddled with faulty assumptions, it's redonkulous.

*cries*
thatotherperv: (gen wants prostate (by clouds-of-white))
you know you've had a long grueling day of writing porn when you find yourself frowning at google, saying "why isn't there a slang word for prostate? prostate is so clinical. I'm tired of prostates, dammit. we don't always call it a clitoris, and there's a reason for that. the word is long and unweildy and makes you sound like a health textbook. maybe I can shorten it. pros. tate. dammit."
thatotherperv: (booth hey good lookin (by savvy_elf))
ok, so have I mentioned that [livejournal.com profile] nyghtpet and I chat and heckle throughout the eps and generally make a ruckus. good times.

Bones spoilers )

for the record, since there seems to be some confusion *glares at [livejournal.com profile] denied_heaven and [livejournal.com profile] vamptastica* the icon that I made (yes, I know. and it's horribly lame and I love it anyway) with the hamster, posted earlier today....the hamster is *NOT* being USED in the sexual act between Spike and Angel. fucking sickos. *glares* he's just a casual observer. a very scared casual observer. to the things they are doing that are kinky, but not *that* fucking kinky.

and then I had a very scary conversation with vamps about Richard Gere and small furry creatures and cardboard tubes. *covers face*

cut for the explicit explanation, not for the faint of heart )

I'm going to have nightmares about this tonight.

ETA: and now Casey tells me people like to step on them barefoot. *wails* what's wrong with people??
thatotherperv: (db scared to look (by 43100))
will I ever get tired of looking at David Boreanaz? no. no I won't

here be Bones spoilers...mostly, pointless whining. )


man marries horse. read all about it.

I had to laugh when I saw that one of the critics had this to say:

Honestly, dude? If you're gonna be doing something with the horse, and the horse didn't want you to? The horse would let you know with a hard kick. Frankly thats not what I find overtly strange. The idea of marrying the horse, I find strange.

*headdesk* for the record, I have a problem with a man fucking a horse. on several levels.




the Texas House today shot down the HPV vaccine order. by enough votes that they'd be able to overturn it if Perry (the governor) vetoed. fuckers. knew it was too good to be true in this state.
thatotherperv: (spangel outrage (by tamibrandt))
so, it's possible that everyone on the planet has already heard about this and I am just very very slow. but did you know that Scooter Libby wrote a novel? and that in the process of good storytelling (*snerk*) it regales us with tales of pedophilia, bestiality and incest?

you can't make this up.

what I love is that apparently, after he was indicted, his publisher totally sold him out:
After Libby's grand jury indictment, his publisher (St. Martin's Press [Griffin]) reprinted the novel, described as "an everyday tale of bestiality and paedophilia in 1903 Japan...[and] packed with sexual perversion, dwelling on prepubescent girls and their training as prostitutes"
(yoinked from Wikipedia)

I have no words.

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